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I went home one day and my wife asked how I got two black eyes. I said "I was following this young lady wearing shorts and the material was bunched up and sortof stuck between her cheeks. It looked very uncomfortable, so I reached out and very nicely pulled her shorts out of the crack. It was then that she turned around and hit me right in the eye."
My wife said "that explains one black eye, how'd you get the other one?"
I said "Well, I figured she must have wanted them that way, so I tucked them back in!"
Dan
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I carry a gun because I'm too young to die, and too old to take an ass-whoopin'!
When I saw a women wearing a Guess shirt I said "I am guessing around 350lbs" She tried to hit but was to slow, plus I a threw a cheese burger & she went after that.
One day as I sat musing, sad and lonely and feeling very sorry for myself, a voice came to me from out of the gloom and said "Cheer up...things could be worse."
So I cheered up.
And sure as hell, thinks got worse!
Dan
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I carry a gun because I'm too young to die, and too old to take an ass-whoopin'!
You have the bog barking at the barking at the back door to be let in & your wife at the front, barking to let her in. Which one do you let in? Your dog, at least it will quit barking when you let it in.
An experiment to prove that a dog is man's best friend.
Lock your dog and your wife in the trunk of your car. After 12 hours, open the trunk. Which of the two is happy to see you?
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